“Have Your Way”

A beautiful, inspiring song, can you sing it to God?  I think God is doing this with my heart, working and picking at it more and more…. I love Him so much and thank Him, even for the trials, no I don’t enjoy them, but God is God and what He wants to do is for a purpose, a purpose under Heaven, even when I don’t know why or what’s going on. 

Praise God.

Have Your Way lyrics by Britt Nicole

Feels like I've been here forever,
Why can't you just intervene,
Do you see the tears keep falling?
And I'm falling apart at the scenes,
But you never said the road would be easy,
But you said that you would never leave.
And you never promised that this life wasn't hard,
But you promised you'd take care of me.

So I'll stop searching for the answers,
I'll stop praying for an escape,
And I'll trust you God with where I am,
And believe you will have your way,
Just have your way, Just have your way

When my friends and my family have left me
and I feel so ashamed and so cold,
Remind me you take broken things and turn them into beautiful

So I'll stop searching for the answers,
I'll stop praying for an escape,
And I'll trust you God with where I am,
And believe you will have your way,
Just have your way, Just have your way,

Even if my dreams have died,
Even if I don't survive,
I'll still worship you with all my life,
My life, yeah,
Whoa, oh, oh, oh
Whoa, oh, oh, oh
Whoa, oh, oh
Whoa, oh

And I'll stop searching for the answers,
I'll stop praying for an escape,
And I'll trust you God with where I am,
And believe that you will have your way,
Just have your way, Just have your way, yeah
I know you will,
I won't forget,
Whoa, oh, oh
You love me,
Have your way,
Yeah

JC Ryle

Found this on twitter, “Disciple like Jesus” posted these two, and I wanted to share!

 

“A true Christian must not be a slave to what’s currently ‘in-fashion,’ if he wants to train his child for heaven. He must not be content to teach them and instruct them in certain ways, merely because it is customary, or to allow them to read books of a questionable sort, merely because everybody else reads them, or to let them form bad habits, merely because they are the habits of the day. ~ JC Ryle”

 

I 100% agree with this! 

 

“(A parent) must train with an eye to his children’s souls. He must not be ashamed to hear his training called odd and strange. What if it is? The time is short—the customs of this world are passing away. He that has trained his children for heaven, rather than for the earth—for God, rather than for man—he is the parent that will be called wise in the end. ~ JC Ryle”

 

And that post as well!  I think as christians, we have to be able and ready to accept that people may call us wacky or strange.  It’s hard to deal with sometimes, especially if you’re a lonely stay at home mom, but so worth it.  After all, the big picture is that this earth is only a “blink of an eye”….

 

God bless and enjoy your day!!!!!!!

A Contrite Heart

I strongly urge you to read this to the end.  It sparked my heart.  Stirred up something God has been stirring for a while now….

http://www.aholyexperience.com/2010/09/one-question-youve-got-to-look-in.html

Is it about Jesus?  I’ve found myself filled with the world and it breaks my heart.  It saddens me, how did I get this way? I see little bits and pieces of how it did.  Sometimes hurt, a painful heart scared to trust and let God lead for fear of the pain and rejection it may lead me to.  Sometimes bitterness.  Sometimes laziness, a saddened depression, with not enough energy to do anything.  Whatever it was and is, God is bigger.  I want to change, I want God to make a difference in my life.  For me it started with deleting facebook, I’m not dissing it or anything, in fact I think there’s some good that’s done in it, but for me, a stay at home mom with no car all day, that’s a distraction that leads me down a nosey path of who’s who and what’s what.  I felt in my heart to delete it.  I in fact tonight went on my Mom’s to ‘check out some people’ and feel convicted by it.  I think God judges us by our hearts and what’s in them, and I was being plain nosey and judgemental.  Facebook’s a weakness I have, maybe for you it’s no big deal at all, but for me, it’s a no-no. 

We’re so ahead in technology and material things, I think we think we have it made, if we could only get this material thing, or that much money, or that big of a house, car, ect…..but God’s giving me bit by bit of my heart’s desire and you know what.  Simply, nothing compares.  No matter how depressed you can get, no matter how many friends you have, how many minutes you have with your husband doing your favourite things, eating your favourite foods, owning your own house, car, toys and gadgets, nothing compares.  It’s not suppose to.  Those are blessings, yes and they satisfy for a moment, but your heart will still be empty without a relationship with Christ.  Not a religion, I believe in going to church, having accountability partner, but I also believe that 2 people can sit together in the same church and one can have a relationship with God and the other has religion, set rules and regulations.  For a while you feel safe by that….but then you begin  to feel the emptiness in your heart.  Nothing compares to Him.  His beauty, His everlasting love that is so real.  I love Christ.  But the last few years He’s been on my back burner.  Let me tell you I’ve thought of Him everyday, I still do, I even think I talk about and to Him everyday, but , not like a real relationship, it’s hard to explain.  I think a lot of your relationship also goes along with all the relationships you had from a child up, your beliefs, even hidden unknown ones that you sometimes don’t recognize until the Lord reveals that whether through a person or book, show…..whatever. 

So, I’m on a journey, I don’t understand all of my past, or my future, but I just want God to direct my heart and take the lead.  I’m in pain, but I think it’s a good pain, like pain that needs to be shed.  I need to let go and let God, let Him heal me of all the pain I’ve ever experienced, pain that I felt/feel that I can’t share with so many, pain that I’ve been hiding because I don’t want to hurt anyone else or myself.  Pain that makes me not love my kids or my husband the way I want to, the way God has called me to.  I believe He’s going to deliver me from fear and insecurities.  I’m so scared and don’t know how He’s going to do it, but I feel freedom blooming and freedom coming!

My family and I are moving from our place called home, been here for 6 1/2 years and owned this, our first house for almost 4 1/2, raised our 2 kids here and dog, we have so many wonderful memories here and it’s soooo hard to leave.  But I feel God calling us to a new chapter in our lives.  I feel to take a year off and concentrate on our own family, grown in God and learn to have an intimate relationship with Him.  Sometimes that’s hard with almost 3 children.  So we’ll be taking a year off.  My husband was/still is on the board of our church and was on the band, pretty much their only drummer, so that took up once a week practise and going early in the mornings on sundays too.  Church is feeling like a chore to me.  Stuck in the nursery with a loud (but cute) 2 year old because there’s no one to take that age in our church until age 4 is hard, lonliness was becoming an unwanted best friend.  I always felt like I was on the outside looking in. 

I believe God is, was, and will be directing my steps, I know I’ve failed in many ways to hear because of my crippling fears and attitudes, but He’s such a merciful God.  I just pray that He takes away my guilt and shame and helps me.  I believe He will.  I pray that I’m brave enough to let Him.  Because I am scared. 

I want it to be all about Jesus.  That’s how I want it, that’s how I use to be…I think….I really do love Him.  I don’t deserve Him, none of us do, but oh how He loves us so.  Praise be to God.

Middle Child Syndrome?

so….posting every Tuesday? fail. LOL!

I’ve been thinking lately about the concept of the “middle child” and how they always feel left out.  But I think God’s showing me little by little about the first child and how they get a little less patience/love sometimes.  I have a almost 5 year old and a 2 year old and one on the way and I’ve been noticing lately how I sometimes treat them differently.  I believe the Lord is bringing this up in my life so I’ll deal with it before it gets out of control.  I actually think I noticed it in another family first and how it looks to me that sometimes with the oldest child we treat somewhat harsher because we think they should know better.  And yes, maybe they should, but love needs to be the guidance, not frustration, anger or yelling.  Yes, I am a firm believer in stating the truth and talking about things in the open and not letting things go without saying something, but the Lord’s showing me in my own life that I need to treat all my kids with the same patience and love and respect as the other.  For example:  If my oldest is jumping on the couch and I don’t want him to and then my youngest goes and does it and he doesn’t understand all the ‘English  words’ yet, then I have to get up and physically pull him down and say no baby, but I don’t feel like it because I’m tired and so I don’t say anything or say to my oldest, he’s just a baby, he doesn’t understand…then that’s not fair!  I know it’s a silly example, but to be honest, I’ve found myself in that situation before, there’s many more examples, but I can’t think of any.  But, if God treats everyone equally…..hmmm…

I think it’s a big ‘tone of voice’ thing too, we talk smooth, nice baby talk with an extra dash of nice to our young ones and then have a normal adult tone with out kids and get upset way easier.

Don’t know about you, but I want to stop this immediately!  Lord, help me to be patient and kind with each of my children, husband and even my dog!!!  You’ve created all of them and I just want to be so full of love that I can’t help but have it fully flowing out of me!!!  Love you God!!! :D  Amen!

aaah. 4 year olds:)

Soooo…..I was just doing the dishes and I gave my 2 sons a hot dog each.  Well, I heard this ding, ding, ding…..ding…ding…so I turned around and saw my 4 year old banging his plate with his fork marching towards me. 

Very politely I said, “Is there a reason you’re banging your plate like that?”

To which he replied, “I was trying to get more hot dogs.”

:S       haha I had to laugh and say, “well my dear, next time you can ask me!”

Now, what would I do if my husband asked me that seriously?  Or if he was a little bit older and was just being impatient and not innocently saying that?  Well, I would love to say I’d answer the same way, in a patient, loving tone, but honestly, on a tired, pregnant day, I probably wouldn’t.  But, I’m asking God to grow my character and make me so I would!

It’s easy to get upset sometimes in this crazy, busy life on this crazy, busy planet.  I have to remind myself (most of the time failing, but I’m improving with the grace of God) to stop, pause and think.  Being a mom of 2 very busy boys,(one in the terrible two’s mind you!), starting to homeschool, part time worker, husband involved in a few activities through the week, being 4 months pregnant, and of course, other life throw-ins, let’s just say I can get upset sooo easily! 

But … I thank the Lord for small successes!  Baby steps, you have to congratulate yourself in baby steps. 

So, to my moodiness, quick-sometimes not so nice reactions, say goodbye!  Sometimes slowly…..but you’re going! 

“My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man's anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires. Therefore, get rid of all moral filth and the evil that is so prevalent and humbly accept the word planted in you, which can save you.” 

James 1:19-21

Gotta keep at this!

I am not a good blogger, but I do like doing it, I’m going to try to do this every Tuesday.  I can handle one post a week, can’t I? 

So, I’m having a crazy week!  First Owen gets really sick last Wednesday, high fever, going to the bathroom a lot, then he breaks out in a fever rash, and now he’s back to normal, well, we’re waiting for his rash to get better.  Then my hubby Ben has crazy tooth pain and has to get a root canal today and now he’s on his way home from work in a lot of pain because they didn’t give him any prescription….waiting for them to phone one in shortly…:) And today, my oldest Cody has a fever!  And we’re out of advil, thank God Ben’s coming home so we can have the car to go get some.  I hate it when my kids get sick, I feel so bad!

So, I checked out Hip Homeschool Hop today!  It seems very interesting…I’m excited because someone posted this site that I am very excited about!  Check it out, it’s worship music with only scripture in it for you to memorize!  I want it for my kids, but as I started listening to it I realized how much I like it!  So I can’t wait to order it, here’s the website:

www.seedfamilyworship.net

So, I’ll find more interesting things and post, I’m going to try and jazz up my site more and more, it’s pretty bland…..

ttyl!  God bless and have a great day!!!!!!! :D

P.S. Please pray for me and my family as we have a lot going on and can’t miss much work at all, gotta pay the bills!!!!!!!

“I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me!”

Amen!

Beautiful Day Out!!!!!!!

I’ve got one little tired boy today asleep b/c he went to bed too late and missed his nap!  Oh well, a nice break for me!  It’s soooo nice out, I love this weather!  Actually if it got a little cooler I’d love it more, yes, I’m an oddball.  Actually, for the first time in my life I find myself wanting winter….I think mainly because I’ve been missing hanging out with my family lately.  The days are so busy and I really enjoy my hubby.  Not having and close friends to call upon yet, and I’m not complaining, I really believe it’s where the Lord has placed me at this time in my life, but I really want to hang with my Benny.  He’s so much fun and we’re so compatible.  Even though I annoy him with my childlike actions…lol  And some people wonder where my kids get it….hee hee hee! 

Moving to SJ sometime in sept/oct.  I’m pretty excited, but really praying and hoping to sell my house…that would be so nice.  But, if God is in control, then He has it all planned out and I have to trust that.

Yesterday’s sermon at church was sooooo good, we had a pastor come in from Georgia and man!  So funny, so entertaining, challenging and bold truth with love.  Just what I needed and wanted to hear.  God bless that man, but most of all, thank you God for obedient servants that do Your will.   He was so funny in some parts, it was awesome.

Man, I hope I sell my house soon….I’ve only had one person view it, but I’m not advertising that well because I want to get all the small jobs done first, then I might just get an agent to sell it because I’m moving and don’t want to do all the work…lol…time will tell, well, I hope to be keeping up with writing on this and try to stay off facebook, ttyl!  Keep talking to Him, He’ll never forsake you or leave you!!!!!!! :D